Public Service Announcement

A couple weeks ago I met this guy at the Stumble Inn, which admittedly is not the best place to pick up quality men. But this guy seemed nice, and looked like a bulkier Brian Austin Green (from the old 90210), and said he worked on movie sets so that was enough to secure a first date from me.

So the following Thursday we're supposed to meet up for sushi and I keep trying to get the name of the restaurant out of him so I could look it up on hop stop and figure out how to get there. I realize a few hours before the date that I still don't know where we're going so I call him and he's like "Oh I was just gonna pick you up cuz the place is out by my house in queens". So red flags go up all over for me cuz 1) I have been to queens exactly once and had no desire to go back again. 2) I don't like getting in cars with people I don't know. 3) I don't like people I don't know (aka first dates) knowing where I live. I'd much rather meet at the restaurant in case they end up being a creeper. But a cab to queens is expensive and I decided I'd chance it and take the free ride, however not without a few precautions:
1) I made him pick me up a block away from my house
2) I'm a freak and I left a note next to my computer saying the date, his name, physical description and cell phone number so the cops would have a lead if anything happened to me.

Sooo we decide to do Thai food in Brooklyn instead which in my opinion is a huge step up from sushi in Queens, and the place was kinda cool, and even had the original swing from Mork and Mindy out front. Dinner is good and the date is actually going well until we get into careers and I find out he used to be a NYPD cop before the movie set stuff. I asked him why he decided to quit and he said he didn't quit he got let go from the force for getting in trouble. So naturally I want to know why. He claims that he didn't actually do anything but that his friend got in a bar fight and hit a guy with a bottle and that guy ended up suing my date instead of the guy who hit him. I can't leave well enough alone so I ask him why the guy was suing him instead of his friend. And he tells me that he took the blame for it, and admitted to hitting the guy with a bottle that night. Why would somebody do that you might wonder? I was curious too and continued to press the issue for about 15 minutes until it was clear that there was no good explanation and I could either give him the benefit of the doubt and enjoy the rest of dinner, or go with reason and assume this guy is lying to me. At this point I remember the sticky note next to my computer and am starting to be very glad I left it, but I figure it won't hurt to finish out dinner and get a ride home so I don't have to spend $30 on a cab ride.

The rest of the date is fairly uneventful except for the part where he makes me take a few practice swings with his golf club outside his range rover cuz he's obsessed with golf. One of the classier residents of Brooklyn walked by us and said "yo [insert expletive here] I'll help you take a swing at that ride" clearly assuming I'm about to go all Carrie Underwood on this car. Sweet. But I do make it home in one piece and thankfully did not have to put the sticky note to use for the cops to track me down, but I am nonetheless, glad I left it.